Sunday, August 09, 2009

Fumbling accountability

This post was instigated by my time spent with my ex-students.

To me, two decades piecing together the building blocks of life is considered neither a short nor long period of time. Two decades to configure your future and to reflect on your past. Two decades to ask yourself, "What have I done? Why?"

As a typical young adult stepping into the real world, we would have realised that life does not go as planned. Well, most of the time. After taking a closer look, I feel that fumbling makes a good word to describe what we do best as human. Yes, fumbling. We have been fumbling since day one of our existence, do you not think so?

When we were learning to walk.
When we were learning to talk (yes, we fumbled with words to use, to pronounce, sentences to arrange and opinions to rebut).
When we stepped into the world of academia.
When we delved into our first relationship.
When we make friends and maintain the friendships.

Well, you get the idea. We have been fumbling and we will continue to fumble, as each new day brings new situations and perceptions. But, fumbling is good. To me, fumbling is a meaningful 'activity' if you make the best out of it.

One must know how to fumble, though. Some people do not even realise that they fumble and hence, not learn anything out of it. You see, when we fumble (and realise that we do), we ask the 'why' question.

Why did we fall?
Why did we mess up?
Why did I get angry?
Why did my emotions take reign?
Why did I take up the offer?
Why did I choose this car?
Why?

And when we ask why, we critically analyse. We unknowingly take into account factors we normally do not. We step out of our comfort zones and think out of the box. We try our best to account for everyone and everything.

More importantly, we make ourselves accountable for our own decisions. This, I feel, is what will make us grow as a person. This is what will take us through life independently, humbly and contented.

Fumble and be accountable. Stay true to yourself, my dear. Life is not always easy but hey, should it always be?

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