SIN Dance Party

No, you did not read that wrong. I did go to a dance party. I can already picture some of you going, "FINALLY!" Well, I guess there's nothing much to talk about here other than the music was great (the DJ did an awesome job) and I enjoyed 'surprising' people there. Best reactions of the night were from Ru Jih;

Eh, Chrys! You say you are not coming one! You liar, you! I wanted you to buy the ticket from me! *Smack-smack-smacks on the right shoulder*

Vivian;

*Collects ticket from my hand, looks up and...* Woman!!! You're such a big liar!

Miow;

*Eyes wide as saucers, mouth agape* Tai so! Is that you? What the hell are you doing here? *Hugs* Wah, so pretty today ar? So not you wor.... (wonder if he meant the pretty part, hmm...)

and Nic:

Eh, eh, eh... what you doing here? WHAT YOU DOING HERE? Alone ar? Why alone one? Where is Shaun? *Prods and pokes* You real ar? You sure you are real? I'm not dreaming am I? Chrys here at a club? And holding a Smirnoff in her hand some more ar!?!

So, as you can already deduce from above, my wardrobe for the night was not something you'd normally see me in and erm, consuming liquid you'd normally not expect me to either. Hence, without further ado, let's put the pictures up!

What we looked like before heading over to Space (with Mei Yen, Angeline - thank you for helping with the make-up! - and Chee Sing):

Then we have the girls. It's a little hard to put in everyone's names considering there are groups pics as well. So, if any of you fellas out there would like to know any girl here, please contact me personally... haha...

The gentlemen who were there that night (as I have individual photos, it's so much easier) were Jonathan, Miow, Jona, Nic, Shaun Yeoh, Eugene, Julian, Bernard and Shi Hui's brother, Yee Hong (or however his name is spelt):

I did not manage to take photos with Edison nor Wei Foo. I also did not manage to have pictures taken with Sylvia and Han Wei. Sigh... they left early.

After that, we headed over to Delafrance for supper as we were hungry. Jona and I walked back home and by the time I showered, it was 5 in the morning. I had to wake up at 8:30am to meet up with Chee Kin and his dad at Darling Harbour for breakfast.

It was an exciting experience, I'd have to say. A last minute decision to go clubbing is not something you'd get from me everyday and I don't think there'll be another chance anytime soon.

Faith and fundamentalism

by Petra Gimbad

I FELL in love with the concept of constitutional law a few years ago; the rights it enshrines are based on principles every man and woman must uphold in order to ensure human dignity, yet, in such a way that we are able to live together harmoniously.

It makes sense that if we wish others to respect our way of life, we must also be willing to do the same for others.

Therefore, it follows that if we expect others to uphold and fight for our right to live in the way we choose, we must also be willing to uphold these same rights for them.

My flatmates recently recommended that I read the book The God Delusion, by Richard Dawkins. I plowed through it at a snail’s pace for the last few weeks, which is painful for someone who can breeze through 10 books in a day.

I just completed Chapter Three. Kiasuness decrees that I finish Chapter Four, even though I had a headache the last time I read the book. I cannot say for sure what it is about (I have not read even half of the book) although it is clear that the writer does not think much of religion.

My flatmate tells me that it is a convincing treatise on how the world will be a better place without religion. It was difficult to explain to him how my cultural upbringing as a Catholic woman has made me a more compassionate person. This does not mean that an atheist cannot be just as loving as a person who professes a faith. I just think that after a while, labels are useless in labelling a person as just or unjust.

The problem, as I see it, is this insistence we have on claiming an identity. How can an identity represent entirely who a person is? Therefore, how does being a Christian tell you who I am, or a Chinese for that matter? Or in the author’s case, an atheist British man?

Being Chinese does not make one filial, neither does being a Christian make one charitable. My atheist flatmate seems to love his parents and has worked in an area which was ranked one of the poorest places in Britain. Something which most of the people I used to attend church with would never contemplate doing, for all their posturing on how Jesus of the Bible transforms you.

Primarily, what disturbs about religion is not so much the concept of spirituality. My personal definition of spirituality is this: that there is a force out there called Love, which is the God I believe in. How we learn to embody this force is a personal journey. We experience Love along individual paths.

Instead, what disturbs is fundamentalism and the institutionalisation of religion.

Fundamentalism takes the view that "it is my way or the highway". It means imposing your perspective and will on others. Faith, to me, can only be carried by one who realises that he or she knows nothing. True humility decrees that what we know goes as far as our best knowledge, which can only be experienced.

Words fail to describe experience.

Words, anyway, are a mere invention to describe what we perceive. What we perceive is only one perspective that may be inaccurate. Language can further distort this perspective. More truthful is, therefore, the truth that is felt with the heart.

Institutionalisation of religion is another form of the "my way or the highway" approach. A friend once pointed out that only a secular country can truly enable a religion to flourish.

With a political system that institutionalises religion, there can be only one interpretation of the Quran, the Bible, the Buddhist scriptures or the Mahabharata and Ramayana.

History has shown, time and again, that this approach had led, for example, to the murder of children during the Christian Crusades and the mistreatment and violence that both men and women suffer on a large scale.

One fails to see the God in this.

One must therefore ask, will we ever learn? Do we have the courage to acknowledge these historical occurrences?

Theology has shown how, with time, interpretation changes with society. Our interpretations of whatever scripture we subscribe to therefore hold no guarantee of perfection.

To the best of our knowledge, even with the most loving intentions, there is never any guarantee that we know exactly what we are doing in the moment. The consequences of our actions carry across miles and through the cosmos, far beyond the boundaries of what we can foresee.

This is what I believe the Constitution protects: the freedom to pursue our paths of choice, but without impinging on the freedom of others or in a way that leads to the detriment of one’s neighbour. How well this freedom and system of mutual respect is protected is up to us.

Who we are as human beings must inevitably evolve. We are constantly moving towards increasing complexity. As opposed to a more complex bigoted and violent reality, hopefully, towards a direction of increasing compassion – for love, truth and peace.

***

Pet, I'd have to say, this overtakes the Merdeka post I so loved. Erm, but the reason I like this article is different to the reason I had for loving the Merdeka one. Aiya, in short, you're superb la.

Tagged

What better way to end the month than to be tagged by my li'l bro.

Rules:
1. The rules of the game get posted at the beginning.
2. Each player answers the questions about themselves.
3. At the end of the post the player then tags 5 people and posts their names, then goes to their blogs and leaves a comment, letting them know they got tagged and to ask them to play and read your blog.

Starting time: 10:23pm
Name: Voon Shi Jing
Sisters: 0
Brothers: 1
Shoe size: 6 or 7 depending on make.
Height: 162cm (I think)
Where do you live: A large 3-bedroom unit in tranquil Epping, north of Sydney city.
Favourite drinks: Ice chocolate!
Favourite breakfast: Roti canai with dahl and sambal, definitely!
Have you ever been on a plane: Er, yea? Otherwise I wouldn't be on this side of the world.
Swam in the ocean: Like my bro, technically, no. I can't swim.
Fallen asleep in school: No, but in tuition, yes.
Broken someone's heart: Er, yes. Sorry.
Fell off your chair: Yes, like who hasn't?
Sat by the phone all night waiting for someone to call: Yes
Saved e-mails: Yes, especially those from Petra, Jon and Audrey.
What is your room like: It is actually quite like me...
What's right beside you: My heater - why is autumn so cold this year?
What is the last thing you ate: Beef rendang and stir-fry bok choy with white rice.
Ever had chicken pox: Yes, when I was 5.
Sore throat: Yes
Stitches: Yes, three on my chin.
Broken nose: No
Do you believe in love at first sight: No
Like picnics: If it is with the right crowd.
Who was the last person you danced with: Shaun
Last made you smile: Shaun
You last yelled at: I can't recall but probably one of the kids at work.
Today did you talk to someone you like: Yes, I talk to him every single day.
Kissed anyone: Yes
Get sick: No
Talked to an ex: Talked to Josh last night.
Miss someone: I miss Rick Kee!!!
Eat: Who doesn't?
Best feeling in the world: When you know you've made a tiny difference in someone's life.
Do you sleep with stuffed animals: No
What's under your bed: The floor.
Who do you really hate: Er, no one in particular.
What time is it now: 10:34pm

Randoms :
Q: Is there a person who is on your mind right now: Yes
Q: Do you have any siblings: 1
Q: Do you want children: Yes, of course.
Q: Do you smile often: Yes
Q: Do you like your hand-writing: Yes
Q: Are your toenails painted: No
Q: Whose bed other than yours would you rather sleep in: My bed is still the best!
Q: What colour shirt are you wearing: Aquamarine
Q: What were you doing at 7:00pm yesterday: Having dinner at a Korean restaurant with Aunty Pat.
Q: I can't wait till: The day I fly home!
Q: When did you cry last: Last month?
Q: Are you a friendly person: Are you kidding? I'm a social butterfly in most crowds!
Q: Do you have any pets: No

Where is the person you have feelings for right now? - In his room watching Indiana Jones.
Did the last person you held hands with mean anything to you now? - Yes
Do you sleep with the TV on? - No
What are you doing right now? - Trying to finish off this tag and chatting with Angeline, Audrey and Jennie.
Have you ever crawled through a window? - Yes, back in high school.
Can you handle the truth? - Yes
Are you too forgiving? - Haha, depends with who.
Are you closer to your mother or father? - Both, but if I really have to choose, father.
Who was the last person you cried in front of? - Shaun
How many people can you say you've really loved? - Not many.
Do you eat healthy? - I try to.
Do you still have pictures of you & your ex? - Yes
Have you ever cried because of something someone said to you? - Yes
How often do you go to church? - Never, I'm not Christian but I do attend functions that I'm invited to.
If you're having a bad day, who are you most likely to go to? - Shaun
Are you loud or quiet most of the time? - Depends on the situation and the people I'm with.
Are you confident? - Yes

5 things I was doing 10 years ago..(1998??!!)
1- Playing volleyball for the school team
2- Practicing the piano like mad
3- Preparing for the choir's first ticketed concert at PJ Civic Hall
4- Helping out at Mum's place every day
5- Preparing and sitting for PMR

5 things on my to-do list today
1- Work at Embody
2- Reply e-mails
3- Update blog
4- Book flights to Gold Coast
5- Calculate my expenses for the month

5 snacks I enjoy
1- M&M's
2- Indomie
3- Macca's chocolate sundae
4- Tim Tam
5- Soto

5 things I would do if I were a billionaire
1- Buy my family and myself a house
2- Get new cars or refurbish what is at home
3- Put some of it in the bank
4- Do up my parents' businesses
5- Start an education fund for underprivileged children

5 of my bad habits
1- Squinting my eyes
2- Biting my fingernails
3- Staying up late
4- Inconsistent meals
5- Procrastinate

5 places I have lived in
1- Klang
2- Seri Kembangan
3- Eastwood
4- Dunmore Lang College
5- Guildford

5 jobs I've had
1- Receptionist at Dad's
2- Teacher at Mum's
3- Piano teacher at YSL Piano Learning Centre
4- Piano accompanist for choir (yes, I get paid!)
5- Waitress at Guildford Leagues Club

5 people I tag
1- Joshua Tan
2- Fong Chee Kin
3- Tay Li Xin
4- Jenny Tan
5- Angeline Lew

Resident...

As of an hour and a half ago, I am a permanent resident of Australia.

Sports Carnival 2008

You must be wondering why I still attend events organised by the 4 Malaysian student unions. To cut to the chase, and also to admit, it is because I freaking BOTHER and haha, I like to be where there are many people.

So, I set my alarm to wake me at 7 in the morning. When it rang, I turned it off and ended up waking up half an hour later. Ah, just in time to go to Coles to buy myself a bottle of Nutella, I thought. Arrived at Coles at 8 sharp, just to be reminded that daylight saving has ended, which means I was ONE HOUR EARLY...

Sigh, nevermind. So I forgotten to turn my clocks back an hour. Thank goodness for petrol stations. Managed to buy my breakfast and lunch there. I ended up arriving really early at the Sports and Aquatic Centre of the University of Sydney. Super early lor...

Main reason for being there was to support Jenny. You should see Jenny in action on court and off. So, er, excited and into the game...

Must be the Gatorades and the Red Bulls that she's had that's making her so pumped up:

The carnival also served as a meeting point, too. Met up with MGM and MFest dancers from last year, like Ru Jih, May Wan, Edison and Kok Kit, who is also my primary schoolmate.

Ah, not forgetting the Mauritian turned Malaysian, Jonathan Leung.. haha..

I've not had so much fun in a long time. This kind of fun only comes when you feel like you are part of a group. On this day, I definitely felt like I belonged. What's funny is that I barely knew this group of people in the morning. By the end of the day, we were exchanging phone numbers, e-mail addresses and snapping photos. I'd have to thank Jenny for introducing her new committee to me! But then, I was also in a self-introducing mood that day, or in Jenny's words, "expanding network mood": Hello, I'm Chrys, er, I didn't get your name. Nice to meet you!

Out of all the new friends I made, I liked three of them the best; Pek Lynn, Vivian and Shaun:

That was what I was up to the entire day, other than cheering for MASA (yes, yes, I am betraying MSA but, hey, I know more people in MASA and they are way cuter and more happening). But, as usual, MSO took the trophy home. They beat everyone else flat in volleyball, basketball, netball, soccer and badminton. MSA won tennis. I think. I cannot recall the results. But, I do know that MSO is overall champion (again), MASA is second, MSA third with SUAMS in last position.

In between, I also took some time to walk around campus, walk Ru Jih back to International House, as well as Chris to his Jewish College accommodation. Ended up finishing off Ru Jih's packet of peanut M&M's, posing to let her check whether I look more like Charlene or Gillian, and talking about relationships. Sigh, Ru Jih, still young la you, enjoy life la. Chris gave me a tour of his college and showed me the MILO can that he's on.

After the sports carnival, Jenny and I went out for dinner in Newtown with Miow. That was when he told us the exciting story of how Nic was issued a speeding fine. He even recorded it on his phone! Dessert was had at the Taiwanese tea place on George Street with Edison. Such a gentleman, he. Not only did he pay for my tea, he paid for my signature hot chocolate as well! Thank you, yea... We finished off the day gossiping, critisizing, hypothesizing and laughing at the wateredge of Darling Harbour.

Lest we forget

On the Chinese lunar calendar, today is when we pay respect to our ancestors as well as other beloved family members who are no longer with us. Today is Qing Ming.

This year is the 5th year that I am not home to visit the graves of my great-grandparents. Also, I have never had the chance to be home during Qing Ming to pay my respects and 'say hi' to my grandparents.

I wonder how this day came about. Yes, yes, I could just Google and Wiki it but hey, I'm going to come up with my own 'assumptions' tonight - I'm going to see how well I can think after downing a bottle of Cruisers. Oh yes, I'm feeling heavy-headed already. You can so tell I can't drink! Hah!

Okay, back to the topic at hand. How did this day come about? To me, I think it is tied down with both cultural practice and ancient Chinese beliefs. Here, let me elaborate:

It is said that on this day, the doors to the realms of the other world are open, allowing the deceased to enter our world. How this differs to the lunar seventh month, I don't know, but I'm guessing that it works along similar lines. Knowing the Chinese race (and any ancient race for that matter), believing that 'being good' on this day towards the deceased would bring good fortune as we would be seen as being thoughtful and caring. This explains the elaborate paper 'assets' we prepare for them to enjoy in the afterlife; even the food that we prepare like the roast suckling, all the fruits, the little pastries and tea that we presumably 'offer' to them.

However, I also think that it is part and parcel of the age-old Chinese culture of filial piety. Today is the one day that Chinese families would outwardly show their respect for their ancestors. No, there is no praying involved at all. None. Zilch. This day is for us, the lucky ones who are enjoying life now to say 'thank you' to the generations before us who have allowed us to have the lives we lead now (although I think it is FAR TOO LATE as they CAN'T HEAR US!!!). It so should be primordial in us Chinese by now, I mean, the filial piety part...

Personally, I feel that this day is the most important day in the Chinese lunar calendar. It really doesn't matter if I am still Buddhist, will become Christian, Muslim, Hindu, Jewish or atheist, it will still be of the utmost significance. Why? Simple. I prefer to look at it from a cultural point of view. We are Chinese and will remain Chinese despite the different religious stands we take. This day may physically bring us to the cemetery but psychologically and emotionally, it brings us back to the days when they were alive. Hopefully, it also helps us appreciate the things that they have done to and for us. Therefore, this day is special because of the meaning it holds.

It is fine if you choose not to hold jossticks. It is also acceptable if you don't want to kneel at the grave. What I find revolting is the attitude that some people have and pass on to their children. Think of it this way: if you do not feel it important to maintain your respect for your own deceased parents for one day, do you think your children will? Haha, I highly doubt so unless they miraculously are peas from the pod on the next tree. I mean, come on! Do you think you'd even be on Earth now if not for your parents and their parents and so on?

I miss the heart-warming feeling of cleaning the graves of my great-grandparents. I have never met them but every time I go, it feels good. It feels even better when I look around the cemetery. It is as if it has woken up from a deep sleep. It is abuzz with life. Many would come with the whole extended family, a whole clan of them! They would clean the grave and give a new coat of paint (some as if they were competing to see who is more creative). Children would happily place colourful strips of 'offering paper' and eagerly wait for the firecrackers to be set off. It really does feel more like a picnic-cum-family gathering session.

On a more personal (and final) note, thank you Grandpa for coming along on holidays with us, for showering me with boundless love and your careful guidance. Grandma, thank you for the fried rice lunch, the last meal you personally cooked for me. The morning walk I had with you the day before you left will be forever etched in my memory. Great-grandma, I will always remember your liveliness and your delicious pig's trotters with ginger and vinegar.

Qing Ming is Remembrance Day to me. Remembering our past helps us build a better thought-of future. So, lest we forget, we have a long way to go in building a brighter future for ourselves and the generations to come.

Guess who's in town?

She has the largest legion of admirers in school history.

She's not here just for a holiday.

She's not only visiting.

She's not on a stopover.

She's been my friend for 17 years, 5 of which we spent as classmates.

The last time we met was nearly three years ago at a Class of 2000 reunion.

She's now here to study forensic psychology for two years at UNSW.


Welcome to Sydney, Nat!

First birthday

Time flies. It seriously does. When I first arrived in Sydney, I was helping out at Petrina's wedding. Now, 5 years later, I helped out at her baby's birthday party. It's a big deal here, birthdays, I mean. A baby's first, a teenager's 16th, then the 18th because that's the legal drinking and clubbing age, then the 21st.

Birthdays are celebrated in style, here. Well, more so compared to in KL. I guess, there's nothing much else to celebrate other than the big ones (i.e. Christmas, Easter, Australia Day, New Year). At least in Malaysia, we have everything from the main races.

Birthdays are even bigger when you're the first child. You see, Brianna is the first child (and grandchild) of both families so naturally, her birthday was a big hoo-haa.

Sadly, I don't recall my own first birthday. I have many pictures documenting it but no mental recollection of it. Not even a tiny bit. The photos show that I turned one at my grandparents' house in Seri Kembangan. Dad was most probably the one who took the pictures as he was in none of them. Mum was wearing a pale peach coloured maternity dress (yup, mum gave birth to my li'l bro 2 days later). Granddad was there with my other cousins. In one picture, I was frowning at Cousin Pei Li because she took a cherry away from the cake!

However, I do remember my brother's first birthday, though. We celebrated it at home, in our first house in Klang. We had a chocolate sponge cake with Mickey Mouse on top. It had chocolate wafer sticks around the sides. Mum boiled two red eggs (one for each of us). Back then, bro was still a chubby, fair and adorable little boy with big, captivating eyes - total opposite of what he looks like now. Mum was desperately trying to take good shots of both of us, to no avail. Why? Because dear li'l baby bro decided to GRAB the chocolate wafer sticks from the cake using his hands! I remember how I was upset with him... funny, the things you tend to remember.

Oops, sidetracked.. haha.. well, Brianna's birthday was held at Nurragingy Reserve and I doubt she knew what the commotion was about.

She was happy to enjoy the attention and the food. I was glad to have been part of it.

Madang

"Huh? Where's Madang?"

"Tai so, how can you not know where is Madang?"

So yes, that was my introduction to Madang, a very popular Korean restaurant in the heart of the city that sounds like a kampung we have back in Malaysia. Situated somewhere in the backstreets off Pitt Street, this restaurant's ambience abd service speaks for it's popularity.

We met up for dinner for 2 reasons: to sort of celebrate Melvin's birthday and to let everyone meet Yu Sheng and his Jenny. I think there was a third reason: to welcome Jenny (Tan) back to Sydney.

The guys did the ordering since they've been there before. My gosh, even when we arrived there was a queue outside. We ordered lots and it's amazing how the 4 swimmers there still have their enormous appetite. There were 2 kinds of Korean pancakes (seafood and kimchi), there was a sort of a tofu miso soup which I didn't really enjoy and we had one type of bbq and steamboat each.

It was funny how our seating arrangement reflected out status. I was, naturally, at the 'singles' table with Jenny (Tan), Miow and Melvin.

Nic and Clarrie, as well as Yu Sheng and Jenny (Chan) sat at the adjacent table. They were in charge of the hot plate while we were in charge of the hot pot. Fair. Sorry yea, I didn't ake any photos of the food.

After dinner, I insisted on having hot chocolate and someone suggested Lindt Cafe. So yes, Lindt Cafe it was and it was there where I was more or less 'trashed' by Nic and Miow. What is so surprising with me knowing who Daphne Tan is?!?!?

Oh, and while walking to Jenny (Tan)'s house to collect my stuff, we bumped into Govin and Deidre. The last time I saw Govin was probably at the M-Fest 2 or 3 years ago! Wow! So glad that he finally received his PR after a year-long wait.

So, where to next guys?

The place I miss most is....

and the people in it...

It doesn't take much

Phone calls
Greeting cards
Text messages
E-mails
Photographs
A short mention in a blog
Even better, a whole blog post
Birthday wishes
'I miss you's
Surprises
'Let's go out for makan's
'Never mind la, I belanja la's
Hugs
More hugs
Pecks on the cheek
Sweet smiles
Remembering our past
'Thank you's

Doesn't take much, really....

Thanks to the long conversation I had with Robin last night on the MSN, I would like to take this opportunity to thank a few friends who have made the last few months 'Happy' months...

Starting from the most recent: Robin, I seriously meant it when I said you made my week. I actually had tears in my eyes when you told me you are still using the mug I gave you on your 12th birthday - something that even I can't recall! Thanks, mate!

Max, I was honest every time I told you that I think you're really sweet - in the history of my 4.5 years stay here in Sydney, you are the ONE AND ONLY friend who bothers calling me up. Means heaps to me..

Josh, aiya, you know why I love you so no need to say la...

Stellina, without your presence here in uni, I think I'd just die of loneliness - nobody understands a Malaysian better than a Singaporean classmate.... hahahahaha...... when are we going shopping again ar?

Jenny and Angeline, no need to say much ler hor? Quick, we need to make time for our dancing sessions again!

August Rush

Music is all around us... all you have to do is listen...

And I couldn't agree more. August Rush began screening in cinemas on Thursday last week and that was when we (Yu Sheng, Jenny and I) went to watch it. It was Chap Goh Meh night so of course we had to kick back and relax la! At first, we decided to watch it at Greater Union Macquarie but mana tau, they were not screening it on that night. Then we tried Reading Cinemas Rhodes.... and yes!

We thought we were late as it was already 9:30pm when we were queueing up for the tickets. Good thing I brought my student card along as I managed to get a student ticket! Muahahahahaha.... Luckily, one more trailer was still on when we walked into the cinema and... IT WAS TOTALLY EMPTY!

I was not sure whether it was empty because it was the last show for the day or because the show sucks. Anyhow, I liked the trailers shown on TV so I still held hope. As we had the whole cinema to ourselves, we sat in the middle, where the view was best (or at least, best for me).

In the beginning, it was unclear as to who Freddie Highmore was playing. It was confusing as they were moving backwards and forwards with scenes of Jonathan Rhys Meyers and Kerri Russell. But without those scenes, we would be left even more clueless as the movie progressed so I guess, they were important. I'd have to say that it doesn't take a genius to work out who these three people play though.

Watching Freddie act is just delightful. You can't help but smile and he is happy and feel yourself tearing up when you see him all downcast. I could not control my smile as I watched him master the guitar and compose his own orchestral piece! In my mind, I was saying, "Wow, he's playing Mozart!" Oh, and yes, please grab a copy of the soundtrack - Kaki King guitar pieces included!!

Robin Williams, as always, played his part very well. He was scary and so unlike the funnyman that he normally plays. Jonathan Rhys Meyers, in my very honest opinion, sings better than he acts. Yu Sheng even thought that he was a singer turned actor. Kerri Russell also put up a credible performance, especially the part where she finally found out about what her father has been keeping from her.

Although, I agree with Audrey that it is slightly fairytale-like, I'd like to think that life can be a fairytale if you let it be. Like Freddie's character, we need to believe. Believing makes everything else work. If you do not listen to yourself, who will?

Spending CNY with Brianna

Well, CNY lasts for 15 days so it was one out of those 15 days that I spent with this cheeky monkey:

Isn't she just adorable? She is able to crawl and is fascinated with the house pets (a dog and a cat named Monty and Sooty respectively). She exercises her vocal chords aplenty, saying her 'dada's at the top of her voice. At the moment, everything and everyone is 'dada'. Once in a while, she slips in a 'mama' or a 'baba'.

She's an attentive little thing, she. Inquisitive and fairly out-going. Still, things end up in her mouth due to teething. I guess that will continue for some time. Her appetite is one that needs no complains as she is not picky with food. In fact, she LOVES eating!

She's moved to Canberra because of her dad's work commitments. However, I'll be seeing her this Saturday at her 1st birthday party!

When you are free...

and all alone in a spacious 3-bedroom unit in tranquil Epping, you have time to take photos like these:













and not to mention the time to make and put up all the decorations...

New year, new hair!

Ok, may not be very clear but at least better than nothing...

For all of you who complained about not being able to IMAGINE what I look like now, here:

Happy birthday to you...

Today 53 years ago, you were brought into this world as the first child of the family.

You were loved and cared for by your parents, and they placed much hope in you.

25 years down the track, you decided to marry a beautiful young lady who lived about 5 hours away by bus. One of the best decisions ever made, I'd have to say.

3 years later, you had your first child. A girl. A year and 2 days later, you had your second, a son.

Like young seedlings, you nurtured these two rascals with your heart and soul. You may not have done so with much knowledge but you did your best. Trial-and-error works very well sometimes.

The frustration, the anger, the heartache and the 'I don't know la's...
The glow of pride, the sense of achievement, the fulfillment and the 'Yes, I did at least one thing right's...

You became their mentor. You also became their best friend.
You were their inspiration. You were their encouragement.

You showed them that the world is not all that bad a place to be in.

But most of all, you showed them the most important things in life - family, friends, simplicity, respect, honesty and individuality.

Today, I, on behalf of both the rascals, would like to let you know that we are proud to be your children. I hope we make you as proud of us.

Happy birthday, Father!

Home alone

Shaun left for home last Monday. It was a rainy day and I don't particularly enjoy driving in wet conditions. My emotions were very much like the weather. Sad. Gloomy.

But having the house all to myself is superb. I reign supreme! I get to clean the entire house without having anyone to mess it all up again in no time. I get to watch any video to my heart's content. I also get to sing whatever song I want at any time of the day and night. Muahahaha...

But not all is rosy. It does feel rather lonesome and awfully quiet. Doesn't help that we live in Epping where it's dark and silent in the dead of the night. The city is the opposite of where we are - bright from the neon lights of the billboards and surrounding high-rises, and noisy from the hustle and bustle of the people and traffic.

Being alone also makes me think more - way more than I normally do. I think about my family and friends. I think about my future and my present state. I think about what life would be like if I chose not to stay. I think about all sorts of nonsensical issues not worth thinking about.

At the end of the day, being home alone makes me appreciate life more. Makes me want to brush up on making use of my time more as well - you see, when you're alone and free to do whatever you want whenever you want to, time management is almost non-existent. Well, that's the bright side. On the down side, I miss the people I grew up with. I miss so many of you. I have my phone bill and e-mails to prove that I really do.

Oh well, I guess I'd just have to wait it out, eh?

The time now is 4:30p.m. Better start walking to the station - I'm off to being out with others - can't be home alone all the time now, can I?

Election musings

Perhaps it's the weather. Or maybe it's because the house is empty. Or it could be due to friends leaving for home to celebrate CNY with family. When I read this article, my chest felt heavy and my eyes were teary. Somehow, emotions were triggered. I think it most probably was because of the situation I'm in at the moment - waiting at the crossroads for the lights to change.

Election musings
Petra Gimbad

American writer Joan Didion once wrote, "Life changes in an instant. The ordinary instant."

Some time back, I granted an interview to a mass communications student regarding sexist parliamentarians. She was not able to see the need for our political leaders to respect women. I doubt that it will take anything less than a personal brush with sexual harassment for her to wake up to reality. We may all arrive at different points of realisations in our own time, but sometimes one wonders whether they come too late.

Sometimes, we never learn.

Election time, we hear, is coming.

Recently, a friend opined that Malaysia is headed for an economic downfall. I cannot confirm the truth of what he said.

Some believe that we should never speak of what we truly do not know. However, one hopes that humbly being aware of how little we know while asking questions fosters better understanding.

Anyway, if covering our own asses is all we care about, no wonder we are in the state we are in. A melancholy hangs over many friends and acquaintances, regardless of whether they have decided who to vote for or not.

Many do not bother to even register to vote, a right people have died for. The answer, apparently, lies in migration. They seem to forget that even successful migrations can take years to complete and not everyone has that option.

What if one has to wait a few years? What happens in the meantime?

What if one’s application does not succeed? What then? Is the only answer to amass more money?

What of the underprivileged who do not have that option?

Someone asked, "Why stay in Malaysia when things are so bad?" All I could reply was, it all depends on your personal calling.

We honour those who perform compassionate work in war zones, and humiliate those who choose to stay, under less extenuating circumstances, for the same motivations.

We forget that for a lot of us middle class English speakers, life is still pretty good. I admit I compare myself to a disabled couple who survive on less than RM500 a month in Kuala Lumpur and refugees who do not even have the legal documents to find work to feed their children; in a society that thinks migration is the answer and forgets that this makes us Malaysians refugees in other countries, too.

Forgetting that our ancestors were once migrants too – whether from China, India, Indonesia, the Middle East, Portugal – you name it. One of my favourite Yasmin Ahmad blog posts lists her crew’s ethnicities from one of her films, illustrating how many Malaysians have their roots placed in more than one country outside of Malaysia.

Is it wrong to make one’s life elsewhere? No. But lest we forget, our country was built on the backbones of our migrant ancestors. Once upon a time, they dreamed of giving their future generations a better life – that’s us. This is not so wrong.

I am not so learned to be able to state for sure whether we are at a tipping point concerning which way our country will turn judicially, politically or socio-economically. However, there seems to be a fear that peace may end.

But I do know that we need to move beyond the fears and beliefs that paralyse us from thinking and taking action. An understanding of how we arrived at where we are, which should include political analysis but also must go beyond political blame.

It is about politics and social science, but also bigger than these.

This understanding also includes our taking responsibility for our action or lack of in the past. To mourn for what no longer can be undone, to thrash with guilt, but also – to let what we know and our sense of justice move us forward, in steps.

I have met a rare few who are exempt from this melancholy. Those who express anguish, regardless of whether they declare their love or hate of this country with passion, are affected by Malaysia’s future.

Whether it is to vote, to read up in order to join initiatives, to write letters to the press or to create our own little solutions which contribute to the huge effort as a whole, we choose or do not choose what we do. We decide to do all we can or less.

We still are the stakeholders of this country.